Sunday, May 28, 2006
King Kong? Screw that. [Warning: Spoilers]
No. They should have titled the movie "Jurassic Park 4: Kong comes for Tea". Bah. The movie was dumb. There were so many times when they tried to evoke emotion. How do I know they were attempting to evoke feeling? They used the fuzzy lense and made the girl's hair blow in the wind (indoors) while she let her mouth hang open. The most feeling these kinds of scenes could provoke from me? Hunger and gas.
This film was Jurassic Park 4. Full Stop.
They did a good job of making me feel the suspense and anxiety as the ape fought with the dinosaurs and as the crew got stampeded by the big dinos and attacked by the velociraptors. Not to mention, they really had me thinking that everyone was going to die in the ravine, that was good. But they didn't keep it there, they didn't go with what they had. They entrenched it in shite.
Good characters were developed, but then they gave us no feeling. I was not proud of them, I didn't feel sorrow for them. I felt like Ann was hot and that was all.
And WTF is up with Jack Black's character? Maybe I didn't get the point. All through the movie, he is a greedy, stop-at-nothing producer. Hell, he's not just a producer, he just wants to make millions, even if it means a live-animal show. Jack did a fabulous job at this. He was a natural. But does he learn his lesson? I'm not quite sure...maybe...he left me with a cryptic closing line. "The airplanes didn't get him. Beauty killed the beast."
...
...
...
Excuse me? Could you repeat that, please?
The airplanes didn't get him. Beauty killed the beast.
I'm sorry, we must have a bad connection. I could have sworn you said "If it weren't for my horse, I wouldn't have spent that year in college."
I have nothing left to say. I will sit here pondering that statement and wait for it. The brain aneurysm is on its way.
The statement makes no sense. The film built everything up to the humans learning a lesson. So many people were killed by the gorilla because we decided to interfere. Then, so many more died because they were so greedy for a buck, I mean show.
The pins of were set over and over again for a strong philosphical or moral point. But not once were they knocked down. I have just mentioned the one of greed. But there are more. Jimmy's going to learn about a man's desire to conquer his fears as provoked by his father-figure character, Hayes? No. No, he's not. He's going to be forced by Hayes (whom I liked most of the movie) to run away from his fears.
Don't go yet, there are more. How about the {like Jack, I can't say the word} story between the play writer and the actress? They hugged a couple times...where's the finish? The hug on the top of the building. We don't learn anything from that. He's supposed to learn from his own words in the play. But now, he sorta has the girl even though he never learned his lesson. Horseshit.
That deuschbag Jack Scriptwriter-or-whatever? Who cares what his name is. I liked the guy at first. A noble character, gives the 'actor' a slap in the face for being a coward. Rescues the girl. Awesome. To top it off, he writes this play for her. How sweet. Then he runs out of it because he realizes through his own words displayed on stage that he has to tell her that he loves her. Dear Lord..."slow learner" is all that comes to mind. How can you run out of a play that you wrote yourself because it is so moving? Maybe he just drinks himself into a stupor and then writes whatever comes to mind. Maybe he has a small army of monkeys that pound away at typewriters creating his masterpieces. He tries to rescue the girl. Maybe he loves her, maybe he just likes to be the hero. He never tells us because he never learns his lesson: He never says he loves her. Not even at the end of the damned movie. You thought from the way he rushed out of the play, "Oooh, he's got it. It's clicked. He's going to tell her he loves her. They'll live happily ever after with a giant pet ape who's jealous cause the playwrite's getting all the action." That's not true. He won't tell her.
Oh oh! Pick me, here in the back. I think you forgot one Ms. Crabtree.
Did I, Timmy? What was that?
There was the lesson that Mr. Denham should have learned when he realized that he promised to give the proceeds to the families of those who died. We all thought that he was going to when his assistant gave him that saddend look from up on the plush, red carpeted stairs as Mr. Denham got his picture taken with other rich people. He didn't.
Its too bad that this movie had to suck so much. While sceptical at first, I really appreciated Jack Black in this movie. Some would say, a 'serious' role. One could also blame him for its tankage. He did a great job playing the 'Eccentric, greedy-without-bounds movie director'. He should have learned his damned lesson and bit it. Or at least whipped out a better line than 'Airplanes didn't get him. Beauty killed the beast.' Something more along the lines of 'Rosebud', 'That's all, folks', or even 'I have to go take a crap' would have been fitting.
This movie was horrible because there were no moral consequences for the characters. There was nothing that tied them all together, made you want to care for them because they cared about each other. The other option is to make you care about the characters because they don't care about the others, but then they learn from this.
How could we care about the characters? Many of them experienced some level development at first, then just disappeared. Where the hell did Jimmy go? Where did the captain go? What about Hayes? He died, then it was as if they all just forgot about him.
This film was Jurassic Park 4. Full Stop.
They did a good job of making me feel the suspense and anxiety as the ape fought with the dinosaurs and as the crew got stampeded by the big dinos and attacked by the velociraptors. Not to mention, they really had me thinking that everyone was going to die in the ravine, that was good. But they didn't keep it there, they didn't go with what they had. They entrenched it in shite.
Good characters were developed, but then they gave us no feeling. I was not proud of them, I didn't feel sorrow for them. I felt like Ann was hot and that was all.
And WTF is up with Jack Black's character? Maybe I didn't get the point. All through the movie, he is a greedy, stop-at-nothing producer. Hell, he's not just a producer, he just wants to make millions, even if it means a live-animal show. Jack did a fabulous job at this. He was a natural. But does he learn his lesson? I'm not quite sure...maybe...he left me with a cryptic closing line. "The airplanes didn't get him. Beauty killed the beast."
...
...
...
Excuse me? Could you repeat that, please?
The airplanes didn't get him. Beauty killed the beast.
I'm sorry, we must have a bad connection. I could have sworn you said "If it weren't for my horse, I wouldn't have spent that year in college."
I have nothing left to say. I will sit here pondering that statement and wait for it. The brain aneurysm is on its way.
The statement makes no sense. The film built everything up to the humans learning a lesson. So many people were killed by the gorilla because we decided to interfere. Then, so many more died because they were so greedy for a buck, I mean show.
The pins of were set over and over again for a strong philosphical or moral point. But not once were they knocked down. I have just mentioned the one of greed. But there are more. Jimmy's going to learn about a man's desire to conquer his fears as provoked by his father-figure character, Hayes? No. No, he's not. He's going to be forced by Hayes (whom I liked most of the movie) to run away from his fears.
Don't go yet, there are more. How about the {like Jack, I can't say the word} story between the play writer and the actress? They hugged a couple times...where's the finish? The hug on the top of the building. We don't learn anything from that. He's supposed to learn from his own words in the play. But now, he sorta has the girl even though he never learned his lesson. Horseshit.
That deuschbag Jack Scriptwriter-or-whatever? Who cares what his name is. I liked the guy at first. A noble character, gives the 'actor' a slap in the face for being a coward. Rescues the girl. Awesome. To top it off, he writes this play for her. How sweet. Then he runs out of it because he realizes through his own words displayed on stage that he has to tell her that he loves her. Dear Lord..."slow learner" is all that comes to mind. How can you run out of a play that you wrote yourself because it is so moving? Maybe he just drinks himself into a stupor and then writes whatever comes to mind. Maybe he has a small army of monkeys that pound away at typewriters creating his masterpieces. He tries to rescue the girl. Maybe he loves her, maybe he just likes to be the hero. He never tells us because he never learns his lesson: He never says he loves her. Not even at the end of the damned movie. You thought from the way he rushed out of the play, "Oooh, he's got it. It's clicked. He's going to tell her he loves her. They'll live happily ever after with a giant pet ape who's jealous cause the playwrite's getting all the action." That's not true. He won't tell her.
Oh oh! Pick me, here in the back. I think you forgot one Ms. Crabtree.
Did I, Timmy? What was that?
There was the lesson that Mr. Denham should have learned when he realized that he promised to give the proceeds to the families of those who died. We all thought that he was going to when his assistant gave him that saddend look from up on the plush, red carpeted stairs as Mr. Denham got his picture taken with other rich people. He didn't.
Its too bad that this movie had to suck so much. While sceptical at first, I really appreciated Jack Black in this movie. Some would say, a 'serious' role. One could also blame him for its tankage. He did a great job playing the 'Eccentric, greedy-without-bounds movie director'. He should have learned his damned lesson and bit it. Or at least whipped out a better line than 'Airplanes didn't get him. Beauty killed the beast.' Something more along the lines of 'Rosebud', 'That's all, folks', or even 'I have to go take a crap' would have been fitting.
This movie was horrible because there were no moral consequences for the characters. There was nothing that tied them all together, made you want to care for them because they cared about each other. The other option is to make you care about the characters because they don't care about the others, but then they learn from this.
How could we care about the characters? Many of them experienced some level development at first, then just disappeared. Where the hell did Jimmy go? Where did the captain go? What about Hayes? He died, then it was as if they all just forgot about him.
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OMG, i totally agree. i saw king kong on the plane to beijing. that last line jack black said really threw me off, too.
i swear i blogged about this, but it must have been while i was dreaming.
yes, i blog in my dreams.
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i swear i blogged about this, but it must have been while i was dreaming.
yes, i blog in my dreams.
<< Home